Example of an RDI assignment: working on 'Planning for imperfection and mistakes' with a child

A fellow RDI Consultant, Libby, came up with this great idea of sharing an example of the kind of assignments we work on in RDI so that people can see how RDI is put into practice in real life family situations. Libby was kind enough to agree to share some of her assignments on my blog (big thanks Libby).

Please note that this is being shared to show how parents can become empowered through working with a highly trained consultant when take the Consultant’s guidance and apply it on their own without waiting for next therapy appointment, social skills class, etc.  

It is not recommended that parents who want to try RDI dive in with this objective as there may be many foundations that would need to be mastered before a child could work at this level as well as many objectives that parents would need to work on in order to be able to competently guide their child at this level.

For those who are interested in working directly with a consultant to create an individualized plan based on a rigorous assessment of the parent-child guiding relationship, please visit www.rdiconnect.com

Sample Parent Assignment

By Libby Majewski, RDI® Program Certified Consultant

As posted on Facebook (www.facebook/kidsahead.com) 6/3/12

Dynamic Intelligence Objective: Planning for Imperfection and Mistakes

Here is an example of an assignment I recently wrote to a parent who was working alongside and guiding her son as they planned a big lemonade sale at their church. This was a project that took several weeks of planning and preparation and the mom shared every step of the way with me (I'm very lucky). I, in turn, guided her with assignments and feedback. Below, I am guiding her to make sure she works with her son on "When Things Go Wrong" as they always do in any big project. Please note that all names and personal information have been changed - the purpose of sharing this is to give the community an idea as to how a developmental/cognitive approach can empower parents.

Please share thoughts or questions.

Hi J,

Here is your next assignment as you continue on with the lemonade sale project. I'd like to explore with D his expectations for the sale and also the theme of ‘Mistakes or When Things Go Wrong’. Although he is practicing a lot at home and is working hard and preparing, the sale, in fact, is probably going to be VERY different than the times he's been practicing. With that in mind, I'd like to work a little on planning for imperfection and having realistic expectations (that mistakes will happen, that it's going to be hectic maybe, that he may run out of certain things that he is selling, etc).

Here is some info from Dr. Gutstein's new dynamic intelligence curriculum that equates to where D is at this point:

- Constructs realistic expectations for mistakes.

- Does not routinely predict perfect performance and is not surprised or upset when he makes mistakes.

- Understands that there is no reason to get upset when you make a mistake, because everyone makes mistakes. Communicates about mistakes as a normal part of life

- Willing and able to co-participate with Guides to productively evaluate mistakes and learn from them

(by Dr. Steve Gutstein, rdiconnect.com)

Work Product: Please show me 1-2 clips of film footage where you and D are discussing (you can make a list if you want) about how the sale will be great especially because you prepared and planned so well and that D took on so much responsibility and made great decisions. In addition to all the positives, show me how you guide D through a discussion about potential things that could go wrong such as if he makes a mistake, or if things get too hectic, too confusing, etc.

Here are things you could/should cover as you discuss the upcoming sale:

Does D expect the sale to go exactly as you and he have practiced and planned? If not (you may have to lead him to the fact that it will be different), how does he predict it will be different? Try to list (just discuss or make a list) some possible differences that D anticipates (with your help).

Does D think it will be busy at the table and crowded? If so, does he think it will be crowded and busy the whole time? If he thinks it's going to be super busy, how will he (just one boy) handle it? Does he have a back-up plan to ask someone for help?

What if someone (D, you, etc.) makes a mistake? Will it be a big deal or not? Will he be surprised if someone makes a mistake? If not, why not (because we all make mistakes!)
What if he runs out of certain things that people want to buy? What will he do? These are all good questions to explore with him (you are free to dig around these questions with him as much or as little as you want – you do not have to ask all these or pose all these situations to him at once).

Keep in Mind: this can be a fluid conversation with D just sitting together or you can make it like a worksheet where you and he are thinking and answering questions together. You could each do your own sheet and give your own answers privately (not collaborating) and then compare your answers.

Due Date: next Wed

Let me know if you have any questions,

Libby

For a child to have got to this stage, two things have happened. The parent has become a competent guide – so she is using pausing, pacing, scaffolding, limit-setting, spotlighting, framing, modeling, declarative language and non-verbal communication to enable the child to reference for information and emotion-sharing, to initiate and respond to joint attention, to co-regulate and self-regulate and to increasingly productively manage uncertainty.

The child has mastered developmental foundations that will include: taking increasing responsibility for co-regulation, initiating and responding to joint attention, not automatically withdrawing from uncertainty, being motivated as an active apprentice, communicating for experience-sharing purposes, comparing reactions to the guide’s reactions, anticipating partner’s reactions (and many more).

So hopefully you can see why it’s not a good idea to jump into working on this objective without first making sure that the underpinning developmental competencies are in place. It would be setting the child up to fail – like expecting them to do calculus without first having learned to add up.For me this is the beauty of RDI and of working with a trained Consultant. 

It’s all about enabling your child to be competent and to have experiences of success, making sure (via the Consultant’s supervision and support) that everything that needs to be in place for that to happen is in place. So the Consultant ensures that parents are competent as guides and that the underpinning developmental foundations are in place for the child and then empowers parents to be as creative as they like in using RDI as an integral part of their everyday lives to promote their child’s dynamic intelligence. 

Questions and comments welcome!